The more you need to flex material possessions, the less comfortable you are with yourself. I heard Suzie Orman utter something in this vein on a podcast, and I now listen to her often since I’m inept when it comes to finance.
This statement gave me pause.
I thought to myself, this is so true! She was actually referring to the Real Housewives show on Bravo TV when she said it, claiming she was sad for the women who felt the need to wear head-to-toe overpriced fashions, drive Bugatti’s, and rent homes they couldn’t afford just to fill the void they felt about themselves. This hadn’t occurred to me, really. In fact, I often thought how I would love to have all of those material possessions, like a walk-in closet lined with oodles of Gucci, Chanel and Hermes.
But none of that truly matters.
This reminds me of an old friend of mine. She is in her 80s and uber-wealthy, but you’d never know she had a dollar to her name. She wears understated garments and never wants her name on the many donations she gives. She is 100 percent authentic, comfortable in her own skin and classy. I admire her.
Sometimes, when I’ve felt bad about myself, I’ve thought, “Ooh, I wonder if I change my look and wear super uncomfortable high heels and tote a flashy purse, I will feel better.” Sometimes, I did that. And, sometimes, it improved my mood. Most often, that was short-lived. It’s all just stuff. It never truly altered how I felt inside.
Now, as I scroll through Reels and Instagram, or even watch TV, I sort of feel bad for all those ostentatious folks. I’m not saying I’m beyond all this, but it just opened my eyes to the notion that we might feel empathy for them, instead of envy.
A car, a bag, a giant house doesn’t signify anything about what’s ultimately important: inner peace.
Alexandra Slater 