I’m not a dumpster diver; I’m a recycling bin spier. I caught myself doing this yesterday when walking my dogs through the neighborhood. I found myself peering at others’ recycling to learn more about them–people I don’t know. There is so much you can learn about a person based on their recycling bins. For example, you can tell if they have a new baby, because there are Pampers boxes. Here are some other clues:
- Blue Apron/Food Delivery Boxes: They are busy, possibly stressed, but want to make healthy complete meals. Maybe send them a spa basket anonymously for the holidays.
- Booze: They are fun to hang with. Pop in with a six pack or a bottle of vino on Friday. Depending on how many bottles are there, maybe stop in any day of the week that ends in “Y.” For more, see my TikTok here.
- Clothing and department store boxes: This person is a shopper, dresses well (particularly if it’s a box from Neiman Marcus or another high-end store).
- Tons of random crap, like antique candy dishes and statues from Savers: They are moving, or it’s an elderly person whose kid came over and decided it was time to end the hoarding.
- Old pots/pans: Why do people put these in there? Is that allowed? They seem confused.
- A hell’a lotta broken down boxes: They just moved in! Maybe drop by with a peach cobbler. New friend potench.
- Peanut butter jars: They are wicked big recyclers and care about the earth A LOT to make the effort to wash out that jar. They may also be unemployed and have time on their hands, as this process is laborious and a time-suck.
I think I don’t like her.
8. Huge flatscreen TV boxes: They are really into their TVs. They probs watch a lot of sports and Netflix. Not huge readers.
9. Organic mac n’ cheese and vegan chicken nuggets boxes: The kids are skinny, and, more likely, the parents are too. The mom works out and cares about what she puts in her mouth, and this has transferred onto the kids. Be on the lookout for boxes from Lulu Lemon next.
10. Chewy boxes: These suckers, like me, have pets and probably a few personalized dog decorations on their Christmas trees or a coffee mug that says, “Dog Mom.” I bet these folks are nice.
Alexandra Slater 